Place the fresh cranberries in a food processor. Pulse them several times until they are coarsely chopped. Be careful not to over-process them; you want small bits, not a liquid puree.
In a medium-sized mixing bowl, combine the chopped cranberries, minced jalapeños, green onions, cilantro, lemon juice, salt, and granulated sugar. Stir everything together until the sugar is well-distributed.
Cover the cranberry mixture and place it in the refrigerator for at least 4 hours. This step is crucial because it allows the sugar to draw out the juices from the cranberries and softens the sharp bite of the raw onions and peppers.
Spread the softened cream cheese in an even layer onto a serving platter or into a shallow pie dish. Use a spatula to create a smooth surface for the topping.
Remove the cranberry mixture from the fridge and give it a quick stir. Pour the mixture, including the liquid juices, over the top of the cream cheese. Serve immediately with your favorite crackers.